THE FRESNAN

Saturday FresGeek: Dead Hookers and Downtown

Since you're probably not going to tonight's game, you have time to go do this stuff:

Downtown Fresno: Tokyo Garden has Poplord and Sacred Math (formally Pinkeye) and if it's anything close to Pinkeye, it has to be worth listening to. Also DT, even if their service is waning, Hero's is still in Grand Opening mode.

Tower District: Suicide Lounge playing the Starline Grill (next to Starline Club, for the Tower District challenged) | Audie's Olympic has Moses, The Dead Garden and Dead Hooker Society | Starline is all about Jay Rossetti.

Friday Fresgeek: Movies/Punks/Cage/Hero's/Music

A nice start to your Friday night might involve the Grand Opening of Hero's Sports Lounge and Pizza Factory, in Downtown Fresno. This place has already gotten a lot of good buzz (and produced some good buzzes) during its soft opening, definitely worth checking out.

After that, if you don't have a game to go to, as per usual, might we suggest some live music? Easy Funk Fresnans, PAZ, will be at the Starline with... well we don't know | Babylon is showcasing Weston Don't-Call-Me-Nick-Cage's-Son Cage and his band, Eyes of Noctum | Kuppajoe's is hardcore with A Hope For Home | Crossroads is holding a long awaited bash for Trey Tosh and his bluesy-ass friends | At Club Fred/Audie's Olympic is LA punks, Youth Brigade, with Sci Fi Nightmares, Old Man Markley, Not 4 Hire and a midnight showing of Another State of Mind.

Get on out there and mix it up tonight, Fresnans. If you have another suggestion, leave a comment and check out Mike Oz's blog for more options.

Fresno Podcasters Syndicate: Nerdstrong in 2009

Time again for a roundup of what's been going down in Fresno's podcastsphere:

Strangers With Comics get into some nerdy hot podcaster on podcaster action by inviting DumbDrum's Brodiemash over to talk up some uber-comicbook-geekness [SWC Episode 64].

The View Looks Good From Here, Fresno doods know that a good guest often means a good podcast. This theroy is proven with their current episode as Greer from Rademacher and Elizabeth Dobson from Fast Forward Speed Dating, join Adam and Ed [TVLGFH Episode 20].

Redwave finally decides to break loose from talking about the lackluster football team to breakdown Fresno State's Spring sports. We say good decision [Redwave Spring Episode].

The Married Gamers will DO IT LIVE, on Saturday, but for now you can listen to their latest gamer podcast epic [TMG 83].

The Overdubs begin the year with some of their music and a Sandpoint brother's [Overdubs EP 25] and then follow up that podcast by bootlegging themselves in Episode 26.

*Oh and don't forget this.

Music Box Fresno: Are There Any Bands In Town This Week?

Fresno musicians are all over the place this week: Fresno native Aaron Espinoza and his band Earlimart are in Japan right now... seriously. From Indian Lakes and Buffalo Guns just returned from their California tour. The Sleepover Disaster celebrated the digital release of their new album "Hover" in San Francisco last night. And, Patrick Contreras is getting set to try out for America's Got Talent, and he isn't alone.

Patrick's buddies, the Super Lucky Catz, are heading to LA for their second round of tryouts. Check out the audition video SLC sent to NBC:

Super Lucky Catz: America's Got Talent Audition Tape

Random Fres-Video: Fresno Pacific Is A Dry Campus? Balls!

Like many Fresnans, I've never been on the Fresno Pacific campus. So, I appreciate vlogger, SierraMascara28, going there for us and giving a very pleasant and thorough review. All you need to know is, apparently the cafeteria kicks a lot of ass and has Mexican hot chocolate:

This StormWarnCenter Is Only Big Enough For The 2 Of Us

Hey! Action News. How many guys do you need to tell me it's going to be some level of sunny tomorrow? One, two? Fine. Three? I guess. But four? With Fresno's predictable weather? Well, at least you're keeping local peeps employed, good for you.

More important: Angelo, ya got to watch your back. Nice Guy Kevin Musso, is standing over your shoulder, waiting to take your top spot. Action New's Top Guns are already making you kick-it-out to him during your shifts. It's only a matter of time. Ageism, that's what that is, dude. But hey, Ang', you could get back at Kevin by starting your own DJ business like Kevin has.

Indie Tuesday: A little thrash never hurt anybody

Tonight, Starline returns to indieness (plus a little industrial and thrash thrown in) with a lineup of Malcolm Sosa Ensemble, Mick Frisco and THE best local band name going at the moment: Robots Love Thrash. Robots LT are playing the historic Whiskey A Go Go on Wednesday night so be sure to wish 'em luck. Starline show details:

Fact: Fresnans Sunnier Than Portlanders

Any chance to take a shot at cities that are supposed to be more livable and just plain cooler that Fresno, I'm taking it: Fresno is the 5th sunniest city in the states with 194 days of sun. That is well ahead of jerkface cities like:

• Seattle [58 days of sun]
• Philadelphia [93]
• New York [98]
• Chicago [84]
• Boston [98]
• Portland [68] Suck it, P-Town.

The Fresnan Presents: Dorktown Episode 69 [giggity]

Just trying to start your week off with something Not Safe For Work; it's our obnoxiously amusing, very poorly engineered and very Fresno, podcast: Dorktown69.mp3

Some things to expect:

• Clerks finally opens the show, loud metal and low mic volume follows.
• "Producer Becky" returns.
• K-Fed comes back to Fresno.
• Ty Pennington does too Extreme of a makeover in Fresno.
• Segment: Is... is that fucking Timmy T?
• Bad singing.
• Farrell's memories disappoint.
• Segment: High Horse: No, I haven't read your blog.
• Music: Fashawn "Freedom"
• Audio problem #2.
• Segment: Underrated - Fresno edition.
• More blogger bashing from Bells.
• Bells is the best hamburger in Fresno.
• Fonzy Eyyyss: complete with Star Wars and male enhancement.

Listen by Downloading: Dorktown69.mp3 Or just use this player:

Bloggiest Moment: When it's time to change than it's time to blog

This week's bloggiest moment can be summed up with one word: who gives a fuck about this segment?!... oh, wait, that's six words. I meant: OBAMA. The first Internet President dominated Fresno's blogosphere early this week. See what I mean:

Beehive|Beehive|Beehive|Beehive|Beehive|F Famous|Edward Stewart|Edward Stewart|The Collegian|Queer Fresno|Queer Fresno|Da Blogs Da Thang|The Fresnan|To Thine Own Self Be True|Urban Knowledge|Urban Knowledge|Gustav's Groupie

Saturday FresGeek: Sweet and Tender Screenwriters

Start your day off [1:00] trying to figure out why your screenplay is so bad, with people that share your pain and may be able to help. Fresno Filmmakers Forum is putting on a screenwriting workshop at the Fresno Arts Museum and it's only 12 bucks - much cheaper than this.

Club Fred/Audie's Olympic will be jammed up with Morrissey and Smiths fans as tribute band, Sweet & Tender Hooligans, take Audie's stage. Fresno's shoegazers, The Sleepover Disaster will be warming things up for the Hooligans. $10 will get you through the door.

If you were wondering what's doin' at Starline, soul band Soular Power and alt band Blooming Hands are playing. Starts at nine, and is five bucks - flier.

Music Box Fresno: Rademacher Releases a tribute to... well, themselves

For those of you that have never completed your Rademacher EP collection (so like all of us then), here is the cheap-fan way out. It's a new compilation CD of Rademacher's first four EP's called RIP GARDENSIDE. You can find some more information about it, along with purchasing it, by clicking here. Enjoy. Tracklist for the nerds:

1) Yr Never Gonna Hear From Me
2) I've Rearranged Everything
3) It Really Shouldn't Matter
4) MAGIC MTN PKWY
5) Playing for Fun
6) They Are Always Into That
7) Careful With That
8) Robot Show
9) Need Nobody
10) Ice Age
11) Last Letter Writer
12) Argument
13) Believer
14) What the neighbors don't know
15) If U Know
16) Courtesy Call
17) What Happened To Your Friends
18) A Little Bit Of Both The Best

Friday Fresgeek: A Weekend Long Sleepover Party - pajamas are "optional"

Sleepover Disaster's new CD is done and is being released Febuarary 10th. But, they are having the first of their release shows at KuppaJoe's, tonight. Feel like you may be gettin' too old for KuppaJoe's? I hear ya. Well there is a show at Club Fred's/Audie's Olympic Saturday night for the adult beverage crowd. Check out the info on both:

Focused On Fresno: What are you guys even DOING?

You bastards. You keep tearing up poor defenseless Palm. It's been relentless. The cones. The holes. The made-up lanes. Knock it the hell off and go pick on some other street.

Refried Post: Kevin Federline comes back to Fresno... well Clovis anyway

As reported by The Hive via TMZ, Fresno's native Papa Zao does come home [In previous interviews, Kevin implied he doesn't come back anymore]. The pics show K-Fed at Clovis restaurant, Japanese Kitchen, with his girlfriend along with his Brit-toddlers.

Sure, it could be that Kevin was just up visiting his family, but I like to think he finally read my open letter to him that was written after he and Brit broke up. I think it still holds up. Get your tissue box out for this one:

It is time to come home, Kevin. Come home to Fresno, Kevin. Yes, we called you Kevin because we know you've never liked K-Fed. We understand it offends you. Fresno won't call you by it anymore.

          Come home Kevin.

We forgive you. Forgive you for leaving Fresno and disrespecting it every chance you got. We understand. Every Fresno native does it when they first leave. It's just something that is done.

Come home Kevin.

You tried Kevin. You left the small pond for the big one. You did, you tried. Bless your little wigger-baby-making heart, you tried. You even got the hottest country girl since Gilligan Island's Mary Ann. It is over now.

Come home Kevin.

It will be fun. You'll see. All of Fresno's nightlife will be yours. The Silver Dollar, Elbow Room, Livingstones, Dirty Olive, World Sports, you will never need to buy yourself a beer ever again. Fresnan's just won't let you. We're like that.

Come home Kevin.

You ARE Fresno Famous Kevin. You need to be on the valley's floor. You need Fresno right now.

Kevin. Come home.

And now, because we've completely forgotten the awesomeness: